27 replies to this topic

[Charon]

Dealing with a terrorist attack, Part 1

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The US government has a new website, http://www.ready.gov.

The thing is that the pictures from the site are so ambiguous they could mean anything! Here are a few interpretations.



If you have set yourself on fire, do not run



If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Vin Diesel, yell really loud.



If you spot a terrorist arrow, pin it against the wall with your shoulder



If you are sprayed with an unknown substance, stand and think about a cool design for a new tattoo.



Use your flashlight to lift the walls right off of you!



The proper way to eliminate smallpox is to wash with soap, water and at least one(1) armless hand.



Michael Jackson is a terrorist. If you spot this smooth criminal with dead, dead eyes, run the hell away.



Hurricanes, animal corpses and your potential new tattoo have a lot in common. Think about it.



Be on the lookout for terrorists with pinkeye and leprosy. Also, they tend to rub their hands together manically.



If a door is closed, karate chop it open.

[Charon]

Try to absorb as much of the radiation as possible with your groin region. After 5 minutes and 12 seconds, however, you may become sterile



After exposure to radiation it is important to consider that you may have mutated to gigantic dimensions: watch your head.



If you've become a radiation mutant with a deformed hand, remember to close the window. No one wants to see that nuts.



-- If you hear the Backstreet Boys, Michael Bolton or Yanni on the radio, cower in the corner or run like hell.



If your lungs and stomach start talking, stand with your arms akimbo until they stop.



If you are trapped under falling debris, conserve oxygen by not farting.



If you lose a contact lens during a chemical attack, do not stop to look for it.



Do not drive a station wagon if a power pole is protruding from the hood.



-- A one-inch thick piece of plywood should be sufficient protection against radiation.



Always remember to carry food with you during a terrorist attack. At least you'll be able to enjoy a nice coke and apple before you die.

((Made by friends of mine- Whats Your Glory and Alibale, who fairly obviously don't post around here ^^ ... I guess they deserve the credit rather than me ))

[jurian]

rofl

[Angelus]

Lmao, quite funny

[¯¯¯¨·ßLùñ'|'mãñ·¨¯¯¯]

lol, gorge. w. bush with his crayon "Again" , nice.

[Crane]

Ha hah; nice work Charon! Those pictures definitely give those impressions on first sight.

[Marko_Polo]

lol that is so funny!

[alone]

Beautiful.

[sarah_rain]

made me giggle!

[Squee]

Awesome. XD

[Stotic]

good stuff

[Deathwish]

Funny indeed

[Xlithan]

lol Charon, never fail to make me smile

[Cule]

/giggle

/clap charon

[Teh_Fluff]

hilarious

[Night_Angel]

i guess is not as funny to someone who worked in anti terrorist stuff? i understand those symbols and know what the pics are saying. i guess it might be funny the captions are but with the pics.... i have no humor i guess.

[Ryuku]

Heh...

[Darklin]

i guess is not as funny to someone who worked in anti terrorist stuff? i understand those symbols and know what the pics are saying. i guess it might be funny the captions are but with the pics.... i have no humor i guess.

Awe, lighten up a lil

[Teh_Fluff]

it says part 1, will there be a second part in the future?

[MCM]

i think each of the 2 posts where supposed to have a part # on them

[Karri]

made me giggle!

Giggle?? My goodness. I read that and laughed myself silly.

Edit: actually read the site.

Edited by Karri, 27 August 2004 - 05:13 AM.

[green_mantis]

It must have taken me half an hour to read this it was so funny. I just couldn't stop laughing.

[Charon]

it says part 1, will there be a second part in the future?

i think each of the 2 posts where supposed to have a part # on them

True true ^^ But I'll see what I can do
Glad most of you apreciate it though

[jurian]

it made a smile on my face which is like uber rare

[dec]

lol thats pretty funny

[archmaster]

o my dad showed me that last year lol

[Redheart]

lol
Well Done !!

[Night_Angel]

ok i re-read it after my cousins told me i was messed up for not finding teh humer in it. so looking at it as if i never saw those pics before it is hysterical. im scared for our future with interpritations like that lol. id die.