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The Story Of Elshira The Spider Queen


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#1 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 10 February 2005 - 12:02 AM

I saw your post Bishop on the areas needing a storyline and since I spend so much time in the Spider Tunnels I thought it would be nice if they had a story of their own. This is only a rough 20 minute job, but tell me all what you think.

The Spider Tunnels

Many moons ago in the early days of the land Nightmist there lived a simple village girl named Elshira. Elshira wasn’t the hardest worker and always had her head stuck in the clouds. She loved spending most of her time in the darker parts of the forest near her village, observing the wildlife. She had a particular affinity for the insect world and especially (see if you can guess) spiders. She was fascinated by the eight legged little creatures and would watch them all the time. She often captured them and brought them home as pets. Her parents were a little worried, but they didn’t take too much notice of it.
When Elshira grew older she made friends with a rather reclusive member of the village that nobody really knew much about. Some days she had caught glimpses of him in the forest and tried to follow him but ended up losing him. One day she finally came across what the man in the forest and saw what he was doing. He had his hands raised up high in the air and they were glowing with light. He brought them down and a hole appeared in the air which he stepped through and disappeared. Elshira stood fixed to the ground, staring in disbelief. He had been doing magic.
Elshira was fascinated also by the concept of magic and made her mind up that she would get the old man to teach her. She managed to get the man to let her into his house and there she coerced him to teach her his arts. Her parents grew more worried at their daughter’s new friendship but there seemed to be no harm so they let it continue until one night they discovered something. A year or so later her father was walking outside their hut when he noticed a faint red glow from behind it. He slowly crept up and looked around the corner to see his daughter huddled over a spider which was rapidly growing bigger and bigger. He shook his head in disbelief and snuck away back inside. A meeting of the village council was held and a decision was made. Elshira was to be executed for witchcraft. The old man was present at the meeting and ran to warn Elshira before the villagers could capture her to take her to her death. Elshira grabbed up all she could and ran. The villagers managed to spot her fleeing the village and took chase. As Elshira ran through the meadow close to her village she noticed a small crack in the ground. She took a deep breath and dived in. Moments later she heard the feet of the villagers thunder past.
She mumbled a word and her hand lit up with a dim light. She looked around at her surroundings to see she was in a great network of tunnels. She noticed a trail of spiders leading off deeper into the tunnels so she followed. They came to a great room full of spider nests and crawling with the little arachnids. She spent many days in that cavern, hatred slowly welling up inside her as she planned her vengeance. Yes, she thought to herself. This would do very nicely to take her revenge out on those who had wronged her. She had learned much from her friend the hermit, great things. They would all regret the day they wronged Elshira, Queen of the Spiders.

The end?

Thank you, David of Draco

Edited by The Unholy Newt, 10 February 2005 - 12:25 AM.


#2 Pandilex

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Posted 10 February 2005 - 12:13 AM

It's good but it doesn't quite fit. Firstly Elshira seemed to be a happy trouble free person who instantly changed overnight into an evil person, and then there's the matter of her (ex) husband, the spider king...
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#3 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 10 February 2005 - 12:18 AM

As I said only a rough job. And I didn't know if the Spider King and Elshira were related or not. What is the story of the Spider King?

And I can change it to "she spent many days in the cavern, hatred slowly welling up inside her" or something similar

#4 ice_cold

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Posted 10 February 2005 - 01:40 AM

As I said only a rough job. And I didn't know if the Spider King and Elshira were related or not. What is the story of the Spider King?

And I can change it to "she spent many days in the cavern, hatred slowly welling up inside her" or something similar

Don't be so haste on your defense. He said it was good :unsure:
I read somewhere that ostrichs hide their heads under the sand because moles watch porn.

ScarletMuse 03/2/2005 11:20am

#5 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 10 February 2005 - 01:43 AM

Yeah, Still getting over the shock of that. I wasn't being that defensive was I?

Anyway, can someone tell me what or where the story of the Spider King is, I'd like to read it so I can fix the Elshira story. Or isn't there one, because I can try and write that as well.

#6 ice_cold

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Posted 10 February 2005 - 07:14 AM

i dont believe there is one
I read somewhere that ostrichs hide their heads under the sand because moles watch porn.

ScarletMuse 03/2/2005 11:20am

#7 Wafer

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Posted 10 February 2005 - 04:03 PM

I like it.

Couple of things you might elaberate on, is why her father grassed her up. You could maybe emphasise that her father tried to turn her away from the 'dark side', which could be the seed for her hatred of him and by extension the town when they come after her. And he might only have went to the council for advice not knowing that they might take this action.

Spider King might already have existed and he took her under his 'wing' when she fled teaching her the more powerful spider magics. As her knowledge in this arcane study deepened she began exhibiting many of the spider aspects. But she was only using Spider King and when he taught her all he could, she usurped his throne and banished him in the coup.

Didn't mean to horn in on your good idea, but you are more than welcome if you like anything. :unsure:

#8 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 24 October 2005 - 07:26 AM

Greetings all, I've revised the story of Elshira also adding in the Spider King. (I called him Ezrael, I didn't know if he had a name or not.) Tell me what you think, any changes you think I should make or additions, whatever. I'm open to suggestions.

Cheers.

---------------

The Spider King – Lord of the Arachnids

In the early days of Nightmist, there lived a great and evil sorceror by the name of Ezrael. He reigned supreme over a large portion of the Nightmist world and the mere mention of his name struck fear into the hearts of the bravest warriors.

But one day, a group of valiant and courageous adventurers decided it was finally time for the reign of Ezrael to come to an end. They fought their way through great trials and difficulties in has land and eventually achieved entrance to his keep. There they faced a great many puzzles and challenges all through which they came through to face the great sorceror.

Thus began the greatest trial they had ever faced. Ezrael himself. He proved to be the true test and though a few of their comrades fell under his might, they eventually defeated him. However before they could land the killing blow to the great terror of Nightmist, he was able to escape, leaving the heroes greatly dismayed, but victorious nonetheless.

There the sorceror disappeared from all knowledge . . . or so they thought. He had withdrawn into the dark forests to regain his power and eventually reap his revenge on the heroes. In the dark forest he came upon a nest of giant spiders who dwelt in the forest. There were a great number of them and he was almost overcome but them, but in his dying moments he managed to focus all his power and absorbed himself into the body of one of the great spiders, becoming one with it.

From then on he took control of the spider colony and drew them into the dark caves north of Nightmist to gather himself a great arachnid army to exterminate the human species.

The Spider King Continued – Enter Elshira

Some time later still in the early days of the land there lived a simple village girl named Elshira. Elshira wasn’t the hardest worker and always had her head stuck in the clouds. She loved spending most of her time in the darker parts of the forest near her village, observing the wildlife. She had a particular affinity for the insect world and especially (see if you can guess) spiders. She was fascinated by the eight legged little creatures and would watch them all the time. She often captured them and brought them home as pets. Her parents were a little worried, but they didn’t take too much notice of it.
When Elshira grew older she made friends with a rather reclusive member of the village that nobody really knew much about. Some days she had caught glimpses of him in the forest and tried to follow him but ended up losing him. One day she finally came across what the man in the forest and saw what he was doing. He had his hands raised up high in the air and they were glowing with light. He brought them down and a hole appeared in the air which he stepped through and disappeared. Elshira stood fixed to the ground, staring in disbelief. He had been doing magic.
Elshira was fascinated also by the concept of magic and made her mind up that she would get the old man to teach her. She managed to get the man to let her into his house and there she coerced him to teach her his arts. Her parents grew more worried at their daughter’s new friendship but there seemed to be no harm so they let it continue until one night they discovered something. A year or so later her father was walking outside their hut when he noticed a faint red glow from behind it. He slowly crept up and looked around the corner to see his daughter huddled over a spider which was rapidly growing bigger and bigger. He shook his head in disbelief and snuck away back inside.
The next day Elshira’s father forbid all contact with the old man and she was given much more work to occupy her time during the day, and at night she was not permitted to leave the house. But despite her father’s instruction she left the house that night and went to the forest to return to her experiments in magic. It so happened that one of the villagers was in the forest that night and came across Elshira and her magic. When he saw what was happening he rushed away back to the village.
A meeting of the village council was held and a decision was made. Elshira was to be executed for witchcraft. The old man was present at the meeting and ran to warn Elshira before the villagers could capture her to take her to her death. Elshira grabbed up all she could and ran. The villagers managed to spot her fleeing the village and took chase. As Elshira ran through the meadow close to her village she noticed a small crack in the ground. She took a deep breath and dived in. Moments later she heard the feet of the villagers thunder past.
She mumbled a word and her hand lit up with a dim light. She looked around at her surroundings to see she was in a great network of tunnels. She noticed a trail of spiders leading off deeper into the tunnels so she followed. They came to a great room full of spider nests and crawling with the little arachnids. She fell to the floor and wept for her persecution. Then she heard a deep voice from the shadows, “Why do you weep little girl? What in the world can trouble you so?” The voice was low and almost like hissing, but she felt comforted by it. She explained her situation to the voice, which listened patiently. He then revealed himself to Elshira. The voice was not that of a man, but a great spiderlike, yet had some traces of human left in him as well. Most would be afeared at his appearance but Elshira was not. She was fascinated by spiders and even more by this strange creature. He told her too how he was forced from his home by confused people who were unfairly afraid of him, and that he too knew what she was going through.
She spent many days with him, learning some of his story and also his skills and powers and slowly she grew in power herself, and also the evil of the spider creature slowly seeped into her, and she began to share his hatred of the human race. She then started to entertain her own visions of power and began to plot against the creature who had sheltered and taught her and little by little she began to turn his spider army away from him and over to her until eventually she gained enough power to rise against him and drive him from his domain, taking what loyal spiders he had left to find a new home. And so Elshira succeeded in gaining her own army and place of power.
Yes, she thought to herself. This would do very nicely to take her revenge out on those who had wronged her. She had learned much from her friend the hermit, great things. They would all regret the day they wronged Elshira, Queen of the Spiders.

#9 Eamon

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Posted 25 October 2005 - 02:51 AM

Not bad, but did it really take you 8 months to adjust it?

#10 combusta

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Posted 25 October 2005 - 03:09 AM

i like it, but those areas are deserted besides ppl who go to kill SK, make a story for chronos, or for the new city tirantek(kinda already has a story tho)

ah the intelligence of combusta, the envy of all nightmist players...

o shut up tony


#11 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 25 October 2005 - 04:10 AM

No, it took me about 10 minutes to adjust it. I haven't been on NM for about 7 months

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#12 Perfection

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Posted 25 October 2005 - 04:19 AM

nice work enjoyed reading :(
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#13 Bishop

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Posted 25 October 2005 - 06:10 AM

Welcome back!

#14 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 25 October 2005 - 07:57 AM

Thanks Rob! Tis good to be back.

#15 Redheart

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Posted 26 October 2005 - 02:04 AM

well done
How does one find the time to actually sit and think up and write a story

Wish I had more time :(
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#16 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 26 October 2005 - 02:06 AM

It's not too hard, believe me, it didn't take me long at all whatsoever.

I'm also trying to write a novel at the moment, that one is a different story. It's taken me ages so far and the end is still out of sight. Research is a big time taker let me tell you.

#17 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 28 October 2005 - 12:21 AM

Right, I had a suggestion that the falling out between Elshira and Ezrael needed some more elaboration, so I've altered it.

------------------------------------------

I'll leave you to find where this starts off in the story, I'm not reposting the whole thing.

------------------------------------------

She spent many days with him, learning some of his story and also his skills and powers and slowly she grew in power herself, and also the evil of the spider creature slowly seeped into her, and she began to share his hatred of the human race.
She only had one small remainder of compassion left in her, which was reserved for her spiders. The creatures who were her only comfort, she loved them as one would love their own child. However she noticed something of the strange spider creature who had taken her under his wing. While she loved and cared greatly for the spiders, he only seemed to treat them with disdain. Although he was more or less on them himself, he only seemed to feel bitter and hateful towards them.
There built a great amount of tension between Elshira and her protector, she grew to hate him for his hatred towards the spiders. She one day confronted him and demanded he cease his mistreatment of them or he shall regret it. She was told to keep to her own and struck her down, to which she could do nothing. She was vastly weaker than he.
Eventually Elshira could no longer tolerate his treatment of her and her beloved creatures. She then began to plot against the creature who had sheltered and taught her and little by little she began to turn his spider army away from him, which was not difficult as they could feel her compassion and his hatred for them, and turned them over to her until eventually she gained enough power to rise against him and drive him from his domain, taking what loyal spiders he had left to find a new home. And so Elshira succeeded in gaining her own army and place of power.
Yes, she thought to herself. This would do very nicely to take her revenge out on those who had wronged her. She had learned much from her friend the hermit and of her banished protector, great things. They would all regret the day they wronged Elshira, Queen of the Spiders.

#18 Äññöÿäñcë

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Posted 28 October 2005 - 09:13 AM

Woot gg :( I like it.
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#19 Raylen

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Posted 28 October 2005 - 10:19 AM

Hey maybe this could get put in under /library elshira ... like we have /library zanitos with a cool story :(
+1 post count ggpwnedkthxbai

it's plausible that the SOB hasn't spawned


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#20 Psyche

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Posted 31 October 2005 - 06:05 AM

Umm... just wanted to say it sounds nice /_/;
Interesting o_o... and surprised to find they didn't have it in library yet. Hopefully it will get entered soon!
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#21 The Unholy Newt

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Posted 06 December 2005 - 06:54 AM

I know that there is another thread now about this, but I just want to say in this one since it is the thread that started it all that JLH is going to put the Elshira/Spider King story into /library.

Now may I just take this opportunity to say:

w000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000t!!!!!!!!!

And to thank JLH again for taking the time to read it and to allow me to make my own contribution to Nightmist.

Thank you.

David of Draco




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